Another Elevator Scandal: The Situation That is Ray Rice

Ray Rice along with wife, Janay and daughter.
**Photo by Google

For days, it has been a national story. No matter which channel you come across or what radio station you tune into, you are bound to hear something about the incident involving Ray Rice and his wife, Janay. Yes, the incident in the video is seven months old, but the general public (with the exception of a few) got its first glimpse of the full video a few days ago via TMZ. How they manage to ALWAYS get their hands on footage, we will never know. The video created an uproar and mixed views were expressed. Initially when I saw it, I was ready to crucify him because we all know how easy it is to judge someone else's situation. However, when I calmed down, though I still felt very strongly about the situation, I began to put other factors into perspective, looking at every POV from every angle. I'll address three points.

1. Feelings about the video:  When I first saw the video, I was beyond disgusted, appalled, and shocked. I had not seen anyone knocked out cold before. I didn't watch the Mayweather and Pacquiao fight that time, so this was new to me. Unacceptable. Even more fuel was added to an already blazing fire after seeing his lack of remorse after he hit her, and she dropped like a fly. Ray stood there and did nothing. He very well could have taken out his phone to play Temple Run. That's how unfazed he seemed at seeing his then fiancé lying in a lifeless state. And then to drag her out of the elevator like a cheap rag doll was even more shocking. Under no circumstances should a man ever hit a woman. I do not care if you are on the freeway, and you are "provoked." Pull your Buick LeSabre over and get out. Walk away, blow off steam. Remove yourself from the situation. Think before you act. Yes, that is easier said than done, as we have all found ourselves in tough situations. It takes a great deal of will power to walk away from certain situations, and it's still something that many of us have yet to master. However, don't do something now that you will come to regret later.

2. Ray Rice's Suspension: Though Rice's actions were inexcusable and unacceptable, I do not agree with suspending him indefinitely. Before the video was shown to the public, the NFL announced its new domestic violence policy. (Click here for more.) First offense would result in a six-game suspension without pay and a lifetime ban for a second offense. If that is policy, stick with that. That is the purpose of having a policy in the first place. Do not be swayed by public opinion or media. Take the scrutiny. Deal with the mess. Don't take the route that's easiest for you. We can speculate all day on whether this was his first time hitting her. No one knows, but this is his first documented offense. Yes, you can argue that he's not "banned," but it's hard to imagine a team picking him up after this. His image in tarnished, and he is damaged goods. You know it's serious when the Canadian Football League will not even take you. He has lost endorsements and who knows what else. At the end of the day, he still has a family to provide for, and as a person who is passionate about her career, it's hard to imagine the pain I would feel in knowing that I probably would never again be able to do what it was that I loved to do. I wouldn't wish that on anybody, not even Ray Rice. I am in no way taking his side, but I do believe in being fair.

3. Janay Rice: We all know of or have heard to situations like this. In most cases, the woman stands by her man no matter what. As expected, that is exactly what Janay is doing. Yesterday, she took to Instagram to express her feelings. Among her feelings of support, she also shares how they will continue to show the world what real love is... I may not know exactly what Mary J. Blige was singing about in "Real Love," but I do not think that was it. One hit is one hit too many in my book. I have never been able to fathom how one can equate black eyes, bruises, etc. as love. If that is "real love," I do not want it. Love may be blind, but I will not be. Though I do not understand, as a woman, I do sympathize for her because I do not think any woman should ever be hit, let alone knocked out. I do not care how upset you are, it should never come to that point. However, you cannot tell an adult what to do. We all have one life to live and can choose to live it how we see fit. If they have agreed to work through it, kudos to them. Because after this bubbles down, and everyone shifts their focus to the next issue that will take the headlines, the Rices still have to live with the aftermath of the situation. I cannot imagine how this has affected them as a family, and I wish nothing but the best for them all.

Janay Rice's statement to media via Instagram.